Sunday, October 29, 2006


I tried on an expensive pair of heels today in office. It was for some fashion shoot, and the reporter hadn't come to collect it back. I didn't quite know what to make of the colour, which was a strange blue/purple with gold thread. And my legs look weird with ankle straps.

So this isn't a pair of shoes I'd buy even if it cost 10 bucks. But the price tag, and the quality that came along with it, made me want it. Wearing it made me happy.

On the way home I mused over this happiness-gained-from-expensive-things/materialism. So superficial! So totally irrelevant! Think of the hungry and sick and starving! But! They are so pretty!!!

And then it occured to me, that the only reason I was happy wearing those shoes was because I
could wear 'em for free.

It would be a totally different sensation if i had a $300 receipt between my teeth while trying to tie the damn thing up properly.

Although I love shoes to death, it must mean something when my brother buys shoes more frequently than I do. I want them. I don't want to pay for them. I am the biggest obstacle to my own superficial happiness.

I don't know what this means as far as my personality is concerned, but it can't be good.


And. I'll see you on Tuesday.