Monday, September 04, 2006

Vague Disclaimers are Nobody's Friend

Was inspired to re-rent Buffy after realising how much I miss Joss Whedon's dialogue when I (finally) watched Serenity.

Sure, the mid-fighting one-liner quips and puns are not the classiest acts around, but I guess I love it for that.

Oh Buffy, I want every single coat and pair of boots you wear in the show.

I first watched the show when I was in Secondary Two, sitting in front of the TV every Tuesday night five minutes before it started and shooing my dad away from the remote control. I'd get goosebumps just waiting. Even when watching the DVD, I don't bother to fast-forward during the intro sequence at the beginning because I love that damn theme song.

I wonder what happened to Seth Green - one of the earlier celebrity crush (I''m sorry, Backstreet Boys do not count) before Johnny Depp came along and wiped off all competition on the planet.

Went to shoot a meet-the-fans session for some actor dude from Korea. While waiting for His Majesty to show, I simply couldn't shake off this creepy feeling that made me want to run and cower and hide. I think it was the presence of more than 1,000 IMH-worthy women.

Celebrity crushes are fun and fine and all that, I've collected a fair number of posters in the past and I think i'd probably be willing to fork out $160 to see Johnny Boy. However, the creep-factor is when a large number of like-minded women converge in a single location, and some sort of freakazoid twilight zone of love is created. If I'd uttered a blashphemy ("His skin where got smooth, so ugly!") they'd have bashed my head in with their posters and flowers and offered my lifeless body as a sacrifice.

Ok scrap that, they'd offer their own lifeless body as a sacrifice to him.

During the painfully-fake Q&A session, the host asked him what his ideal girl should be like. He'd be uttering politically-correct statements so far so I was expecting the usual "its what's inside that counts" statements.

But instead, he said that she should be "feminine". And have a good complexion.

"Can she be fat?"

I held my breath. I wanted to yell "TELL THE TRUTH YOU BASTARD!!! Tell half the room they don't stand a chance!"

He put on an apologetic look, and slowly shook his head. For the first time, the room didn't oohh and aaahh at his reply.

The host tried to rescue the situation, but I think the damage was done.

I thought it was bloody hilarious.


jas said...

the poor imh-worthy aunties. the most impt lie he had to tell, and he didn't. hahhaa